With Or Without You
by kimberleenadine
Summary: Chuck can't live with, or without Blair. But he's going to make it work, third time round is it?


_a/n: _set after season 2. B&C FTW. review plz. if you want it updated? or not? :D lemme know guys. i don't own **with or without you**. sadly. and i prefer basing this one on the version by **breathe carolina** because it's a bit more powerful to me. especially with the tiny screaming bit. it penetrates my soul and makes me feel a thousand feelings. :D

so whats the lowdown in this fic? well, after chuck told blair he didn't love her, basically, she fled from manhattan and went into hiding. as far as anybody is concerned, blair is nonexistent. (Gossip Girl would have a field day on this, wouldn't she!? :P) and Chuck is trying to wheedle himself back into Blair's life, realising it was a mistake to let her go, and that he can't live without her.

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With Or Without You

_i can't live, with or without you - U2 _

**RAIN** poured down on the window, crashing against it as if the oceans had let loose and were pulverising New York City. Blair couldn't sleep, and she turned onto her back to watch the rain fall, everlasting and never ending. She pulled a hand through her knotted hair and then swiped the other hand over her sore, tired, dry, eyes. It was cold. Too cold. She needed warmth and she felt too alone in this tiny apartment she had rented out in Brooklyn. And the only reason as to why she had rented it was to get away from the likes of Elenore Waldorf, Cyrus, her new loving step-father, and possibly the entire crowd of Upper East Side.

Her cell rang, five times, she ignored it. Only when it had given up for the second time, did she pick it up and look at the caller ID. The first was Serena, her best friend, and the second was Nate Archibald, a young-man whom she was supposed to be sharing a bed with at this very moment. She sighed and deleted the missed calls before turning over in her sleep again and closing her eyes.

Charles Bass, the second boy she had loved, had told her that the feelings he felt for her, were nonexistent, and he was playing a game with her. Of course. It was all Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf did; play games. But things had to get serious on Blair's side. Though she could have _sworn_ he may have shown love to her once or twice. Or more. The way he looked at her, when he was drugged up and drunk out of his mind. Sometimes he would look helpless. He would _beg_ her. She swore.

Blair chided herself, because upon reminiscing in these thoughts, tears had begun to slide down her cheek, and the other side had absorbed into her cold pillow. It had been several months since she had seen, or talked, to Chuck Bass. As far as she was concerned, they were over. _Way_ over.

Blair sat up, disgusted with herself and she got out of the bed and padded across the tiny room towards the kitchenette so she could pour herself a glass of water. She sniffed and then blew her nose. But alas, sobs wracked through her body and she could not contain them. Her phone began to ring once more and she glanced at the caller ID amidst her tears and saw the initials flash across the screen.

He was calling her? After seven months and five days? He was _calling_ her? It went to answer phone and when it had stopped she picked it up and listened to the message. His deep voice filled her ears once more and she had to hold in her sobs so she could hear the message;

_Blair? Blair. I know you're there. Pick up the Goddamn phone. Where the fuck are you? I...Blair, don't do this, I - _there was a loud shout in the background from a person who sounded like Serena and then Chuck hung up.

Blair let loose her held in sob and then dropped the cell on the bed. She should call him back. She knew she should. It was 3 in the morning. He would be in his room, alone, wouldn't he? Just as Blair was about to hit the _call_ button, it started to buzz again. She pressed _answer_.

"Blair!" He whispered, his voice a hushed cry. There was the sound of the rain and wind and she wondered where he could be. On the roof maybe? Out on the street? She wiped a tear away and held her hand over the microphone so she could sniff. "Blair? Hello? Talk to me. Blair. Why the _fuck_ are you doing this? Nate is beside himself. Serena won't sleep. I haven't seen your mom, or Cyrus...but...if they know where you are I _will_ find out."

They knew. Of course they knew.

Chuck _would_ find out. Blair panicked and hung up. Feeling sick now, she took herself back to bed and lay her head over the pillow and pulled the duvet over her body, snuggling deep into it's warmth.

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"Have you talked to her?"

Chuck looked at Serena. She had heavy bags under eyes from lack of sleep, and her voice was drained and quiet from crying. Chuck massaged his throbbing head and shook it. Obviously Blair was in hiding.

Because of him.

Chuck pressed his lips together. Too many times he had taken the blame for Blair's disappearance, and he deserved every hit, even the few slaps he had gotten off Serena. Even though Little J didn't particularly like Blair, she still gave Chuck the dirty look. And Nate, his best friend, was oblivious to it all.

"I'm going out. I'll be back later." He said to Serena and then buttoned his coat up, walking out of the penthouse swiftly. He arrived at the Waldorf apartment in less than five minutes, and he stormed up the stairs, running a hand through his wet hair. He entered Blair's room and rummaged through her drawers, closet, anything he could rummage through, and sighed when he found nothing.

Grimacing, he picked her pillow up and inhaled. It still smelt like her; sweet yet exotic at the same time. "Who-? Chuck?" Elenore Waldorf stood at Blair's bedroom door and she flicked the light on. "What are you doing here?"

"Mrs Waldorf, I need to know where Blair is." He said, blinking and shaking his head. "...Not Serena, or Nate...Or anybody else. Just me. Me alone needs to know where Blair is." He said, advancing on Elenore and holding her hands in his.

Elenore contemplated the boys wishes. Her head tilting to one side as her own eyes bore into his pleading ones, shiny with what looked like tears. Seven months and five days, only _now_ did Chuck Bass want to know where Blair was. She shook her head and sighed, lowering her eyes to the floor. Chuck lowered himself to his knees.

"I am Charles Bass, and I am on my knees."

**TBC**

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